speaking out on a recent frustration

20 03 2011

I hate to be negative [especially “in public”] but I need to explain the lack of something that is probably expected of me.

Since Real World DC, I’ve been known for my involvement with the show and all of the seasons as they happen. My chats, podcasts, and cast scoops have brought a lot of people on board and also keep them coming back. You know all of this already.

Last season was obviously a little harder than RWDC to get the cast involved in my blog and everything I do. This season is proving to be nearly impossible. It’s evident that they’ve been told not to join in on any of my chats or podcasts.

I, along with some of the roommates, have asked their PR lady if I can talk to them, and she says no. No explanation. No “if ____ happens, maybe we can make it work.” Just straight up absolutely not.

Last season, Preston, Eric, and Ashlee did podcasts/chats without worrying about getting the approval, but no one is biting on taking the risk yet.

BUT!!! Don’t you dare think I’m going to go all “I give up on all this stuff.” False accusation. There are going to be people contacted, I’m going to keep trying, and if all of this fails, then I will have to find some substitute actions.

It really just doesn’t make any sense. Sure, I did what I did in DC, but people loved it. MTV loved my chats and my podcasts. They picked me for the TJ competition. They hosted my chats on their site. They joined me in my chats. I actually have my own radio show now. I’m better at interviews than I was a year ago. Yet other people are getting multiple opportunities for interviews etc a week.

If you’d like to help convince this lady to let this ish happen, let me know. I have a back-up plan that could totally use an army. In the meantime, keep your fingers crossed. I miss being able to do this regularly! I like big projects. I like having a purpose. I like having a theme and something for people to look forward to on schedule.

Also- if you’re anywhere near the College Station area, be on the lookout for a Real World themed announcement. Hint: It’s a party! 😉

NO ONE CAN STOP ME! They can only slow me down!

i have to thank you all… and remind you of one thing

13 03 2011

Last week was National Write A Letter of Appreciation Week, and though I’m a little late in celebrating, it’s better late than never, right?

You see, I won a Texas Social Media Award on Thursday! I’ll tell you all about that in a sec, but first I owe everyone a huge thank you. Without you, I wouldn’t have gotten it. Without my readers, followers, listeners- I’d have nothing. Thanks for putting up with my ridiculosity. Thanks for pretending I’m interesting. Thanks for the compliments on the nominations page for the award, and most importantly- Thanks for keeping me going day after day!

Another thing I realized- If I hadn’t had the crazy, random idea of “stalking” the Real World DC, I would have nothing that I have now. It’s really scary to think about, actually. It was such a simple, random, sporadic idea that came about when I was bored,  and next thing I knew- people knew who I was, my following increased more than 10x, and I felt like I had a chance in doing something with my life.

If I hadn’t made those videos, I wouldn’t have had a guest spot on Kane’s show. I wouldn’t have gotten over 1,000 followers overnight. I’d only have about 250 people looking at my blog a day. Candy95 wouldn’t have hired me or thought I was some cool internet vlogger. I wouldn’t have been selected for the MTV TJ top 25. I wouldn’t have this Texas Social Media Award.

I probably would have given up on my blog by now out of frustration [terrible to admit, but true.] I’d still be fighting with my parents every Wednesday night. I’d be working at some no-fun job, doing a radio for free on the Internet with the hopes of someone finding me. I’d be stalking Toby Knapp begging him to get me a job somewhere.

I’d be miserable.

It’s insane to think about how one spur of the moment idea honestly shaped the rest of my life. So many people told me not to do it. That it was way too weird. I’d get in trouble. They’d hate me. But I couldn’t be more thankful for the fact that I did it, and it just makes me want to remind everyone one thing:

If you ever have an idea, no matter how crazy, dumb, simple, ridiculous etc. it sounds- act on it. Immediately. Worry about the results/reactions later. Wondering “what if?” sucks. Listening to people who say “you’re freaking crazy” is dumb. Tell them to suck it, sit back, and watch you have fun and do something awesome.

something needs to change… decisions, decisions

21 01 2011

Note: I’m a tad frustrated, so if I come off as a super angry EB, I’m sorry. I’m a perfectly happy person… I just hate change.

I’ve been working on a lot of new things at the station. I come up with ideas that I think are great, so obviously I like to make my ideas happen. What’s the point in coming up with a good idea if you’re not
going to execute?! I love it. I love making videos every day. I love getting creative. I love that I was 1/3 of a team that completely rebuilt the website and made it into something awesome.

The problem: It all takes up a lot of time.

And really, that’s not even so much of an issue. Drowning myself in work in order to make myself better and always stay busy is something I like doing… but when you’re getting constant headaches from staring at a computer screen for 15 hours a day, it’s not fun.

ANYWAY… I don’t want to sit here and complain. My point in this is to express my thoughts and desires of what I think needs to happen.

When it comes to my blog, I started that thing writing about 7-10 posts a day. When I moved here, it became about 5. At this point, I think that might be asking a little much of myself. If I want to put effort into finding good stuff to share, and not just anything I find and can quickly post, it’s going to take a lot of time that I just don’t have.

I DON’T WANT TO LET ANYONE DOWN! Especially myself and my future. My blog is my life. It’s what I’m most proud of. I started it from the bottom and built it up into something that has given me so many opportunities. Giving up on it is not an option.

….But how do I keep it up, not let anyone down, not lose followers/readers, and get at least a few hours of sleep? I really don’t know the answer right now. It scares me.

I really want to hear from everyone. I want to know what you really like about my blog… Meaning what posts do you get excited to read? What posts could you do without?

I’ve always posted about anything that I found interesting, and I’ll be posting a lot of random things on my Candy blog, but maybe I should really narrow love, EB down to specific topics… Post one or two posts a day like Tunes on Tuesday, I Spy, Real World, Ellen, etc…

PLEASE let me know! I put some easy polls to vote on the side ——>, or I’d absolutely love it if you left comments. Be harsh. Be honest.

I refuse to give up. I refuse to end my blog. I refuse to change…. But it’s time for me to admit- I need to cut back a little. Forgive me? ❤

why i’m proud to be “anti-smartphone”

12 01 2011

As a Verizon customer, a lot of people are probably thinking I’m going to jump on the opportunity to get the new iPhone come February. Truth is: I don’t think I will.

I say it all the time: I’m anti-smartphone. I don’t say this to be cool or be all opposite-of-hipster-which-makes-me-kinda-hipster. I genuinely mean it. Call me old fashioned, but I think a smartphone could be the end of my life.

Look at my life right now: I work all day. I come home after work and blog all night. I tweet at least 30 times a day. I stalk enough people online that it’s already considered relatively unhealthy… And this is all without a smartphone. Without internet on me 24/7.

On the weekends, I purposely turn off my computer so that I can get away from that world I drown myself in all week. I tweet about 5 times a day. I go out and hang with human beings [or Slutty Cat, depending on how emotional-cat-lady I feel like being]. It’s such a relief to just let everything go and hit the I-don’t-give-an-F phase. When someone asks me, “Didn’t you get my email?” I can say “Nope. I don’t have a smartphone, remember? You’ll have to call me if it’s urgent.”

What if I had a smartphone?!

I’d be tweeting two or three times as much. I’d always be on call for work related things. My thumbs/hands would probably hurt even more. And most importantly: My real friends:online friends ratio would change dramatically.

If you’ve ever been to dinner or out anywhere with a group of people with smartphones, it’s like the real world doesn’t exist. They’re paying more attention to the tweets, Facebook updates, trending topics, viral videos, celebrity happenings, etc etc etc than the living thing right in front of them. I’m far enough from all my friends as it is, and as much as social media helps keeping in touch become a lot easier, it makes it a lot more fake too.

Phone calls are what make you feel the closest to someone who’s not right next to you. Texts come in second. That’s all I need in a phone. I have a GPS, and *GASP* I know how to write down directions from a map. If something major happens that I HAVE to know about, I trust people to let me know. With a smartphone, you become dependent on everything it comes with, and if there were ever a time that you didn’t have that device, you’d be absolutely lost, physically and emotionally.

Finally- Texting. Let’s be real: Texting happens a lot more than dialing these days. Let’s be real about something else: As funny as damnyouautocorrect.com is, the fact that you can’t just type in a message on you’re own without worrying about looking like you’re hammered or on drugs is flipping annoying. I like my T-9. I very rarely even open the flip of my phone for the QWERTY keyboard because T-9 is the quickest and easiest for me. I use one hand. I don’t have to look. Texting while driving is actually safe for me, and I mean that. A touch screen phone can’t say the same, no matter how hard you try to convince a

I’m not here to convince all you crazy people that smartphones are the devil; I know that’s impossible. I just wanted to speak my mind and really show you that as much as I know I need one for my job and that it’d be smart, I don’t want one. I’m keeping my EnV3 for as long as it can survive… Even if it’s the last one on this planet.

mtv asks: what inspires me

11 07 2010

One part of challenge #2 for MTV TJ is to share with the world what drives me.

If there was one thing that I kept in my mind at all times to make sure I keep going after what I want in life and never give up, it’s this quote:

Strivers achieve what dreamers believe.

I heard Usher say it one time, actually. Not sure if he took it from someone or not, but I know that when it comes time to make my acceptance speech for anything I may get (which will hopefully come in August, rather than later in life) I have to thank Usher.

Lots of people say they want to make it big. They want to get their dream job. They want to move away. They want to try new things. You can’t just say it though. You have to do anything and everything in your power to make sure those things happen.

For the past two years I’ve been busting my ass trying to make sure my blog is something people will come back to, while trying to find a job. Now I have a full-time job on top of my blog, and now challenges to complete every three days.

It’s not easy…. But it’s 100% worth it. I would never have been given this opportunity if I would have listened to the people who said “why waste so much time on your blog?! Have fun and live a little! It’s pointless to do all that if no one’s reading it!” All of those people are still sitting at home on their couch saying “I’m going to make it big one day.”

I have dreams, I have goals, and I have a future that I want. If I forget about it or let it go for even just a second, I could miss out on an awesome opportunity.

So if I were to give you advice I’d say write that quote down and put it in your wallet and keep it there forever, just like I did. Keep inspiration all around you and never let the haterade get into your system. It’s a deadly poison.